{The Ordinary Moments 16} #5 -A Tough One

I love these posts so much because I am able to write down all the little special moments in our lives, and remember them when my little babies are all grown up and no longer want mummy all the time. However, with all the special memories we create, I will make no illusion to say there are no tough times. There are, and they happen frequently, after all, I am a mummy to two boys under 3, and although I feel that dealing with a newborn is rather easy, when you mix it in with a toddler, it becomes less so.

This week has been difficult. Really difficult. I feel like I hit a brick wall of exhaustion this week that has just smothered me, and made me lose all motivation. My house is a mess, I’ve not been very patient, I’ve not been very playful, and just generally entered the ‘bad mothering’ zone. I don’t really know why, I think it’s just a mixture of running after a toddler who is going through a challenging stage. I’m a worrier, and Finlay has been going through a ‘terrible twos’ stage, and everything I say or do he just completely ignores. He climbs everything, and is really into throwing. I’m just so fed up with telling him off, and I worry I have made him this way? Is this my fault? Maybe I don’t play with him as much as I should, tell him off too much, don’t explain things well enough, lose my patience far too easily, don’t laugh as much as I should, am on my phone too often. All these things just go around in my head, and I’m really finding it difficult, and this week has just felt like one massive fail.

I know it will get easier, and as the days go on I will pick myself back out of this horrid mood I’m in. I’m so blessed to have two beautiful boys who I adore more than anything, but sometimes you fall down a little. I am really hoping I will find this week a little easier, and enjoy it a bit more.

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{The Ordinary Moments 16} #4 – Favourites

Ever since Finlay could properly watch TV we’ve gone through different stages of liking different programmes. I’ve never had a problem with Finlay watching TV or playing on the iPad. I know a lot of people don’t like it or only in moderation which I can completely understand and respect. Personally for us, the TV is always on, he loves to watch Disney Junior and watch films and I don’t mind admitting that he does watch it a lot, he’s not glued to it all day, but it’s always on for him to watch.

I can remember his first favourite TV programme was Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. He was obsessed with Mickey and would get so excited about anything to do with him. We had endless amounts of Mickey teddys, toys, clothes and books. I Just find it so sweet for him to have these little characters which he absolutely adores, which then leads me on to this weeks Ordinary Moment.

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One of Jacks favourite Disney films was Toy Story, and it’s safe to say he’s been watching it with Finlay for a long time in the hope that one day he would love it just like he did, even from when he was a tiny baby we would dress him in cute little Woody and Buzz clothes and have always showed him them in the Disney Store which we are massive fans of! He first got into Toy Story a while ago and always demands for me to put it on, we easily watch it twice a day, but lately the love for it has just grown, its by far his favourite film, and for Christmas we bought him both Buzz and Woody, reluctantly as we thought he was a bit young for them, but we couldn’t have been more wrong.

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Buzz especially is absolutely glued to his side each and everyday, and he now even takes them both up to bed with him. It just melts my heart, to see him bond with something like his little toys, they have become a comfort, a little friend, that he chatters away to all day, that he demands share every memory he makes, and to see him laying in bed all tucked up and zonked, with Buzz tucked up just beside him is something that is almost too cute to handle. I just love how something so simple and small, can be such a massive thing in a toddlers eyes, it just completely emphasises the innocence in him and I just never ever want that to go away, although I know it will, its these little memories and phases that are just so special to me.

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{The Ordinary Moments 16} #3 – Our Ordinary

I don’t know about anyone else but as soon as one person becomes poorly in our household, it’s suddenly just a downwards spiral until we have all been taken down by the lurgy! This time I was first, then Jack, and now Fin. When you’re poorly the last thing you want to do is have to run around after the hyper toddler, and meet the demands of a baby. It’s tough enough when you’re at your best, let alone when you feel you cant physically look after yourself!

Which is why we are so lucky to have such supportive parents, and both sets offered to have one child each for the night! Fin went to Jacks parents and Jacob went to mine. We were so grateful and I felt so much better for one day not having to worry about endless nappy changes, bottles, lunches, dinners, having to constantly tell the toddler to get off of the windowsill (atleast 10 times a day). Instead we were able to just lay on the sofa and catch up on rubbish TV, I even managed to have a bath at about 6pm!! Unheard of! It was just nice to relax.

However as much as not having the children around is nice at times, especially when you’re ill. Its quiet, too quiet. There is just something about having children in the house that suddenly makes it become a home. Yes, my house becomes a playground, and the show home I would like, is more to the standard of a grubby looking soft play area, but its my home, our home. It’s a place filled with memories such as first steps, first words, first smiles. Although the idea of sitting on my sofa watching Netflix is beyond a dream, where’s the meaning? Where’s my reason? My washing pile is never ending, it overflows daily, but where would I be without getting my babies into their adorable little pyjamas and co-ordinating outfits each day? My walls would be crisp, and the paint would never be scratched, my carpets would be the same colour as the day they were fitted, and I wouldn’t have to dodge bath toys during my relaxing bath. But I like the red stains on my wall from my toddler driving his cars up and down it, I like the little stain from where my toddler decides chocolate hand prints would look really good there, and I like that I stare at bath toys in my relaxing bath because I see his face, the face of wonder and innocence, the face that learns from everything he touches, the face of pure happiness.

A break is more than welcomed from time to time, but each time it happens, I miss them. Although they are only gone for one night, my home becomes just a house, the meaning in my day suddenly becomes irrelevant, and that’s when you realise what being a parent is. They are my reason, and although our house, and our family are just like any other ordinary family. It is our ordinary, and to me that makes them so wonderfully extraordinary.

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{The Ordinary Moments 16} #2 – Time With Nanny

This is my 2nd week of joining in with ‘The Ordinary Moments’. I love these posts, I find them easy to write as there are a number of moments in the week that I cherish. I love being able to write them down to look back on. I also love to read others, and how they all vary week by week!

This is my first full week going back to being on my own during the days with the little ones, and I must say I feel much more settled in to life with having two children than I did before Christmas. Before Christmas I’d be lying if I said I thought it was easy. It’s never easy, but this week I really felt we’d turned a corner and I am managing my time with the children a lot better. The main thing I’ve noticed is that I’m definitely finding it easier to get out of the house, although it can still take a long time to actually get out of the door.

My mum only works Mondays and Fridays so on a Tuesday or Thursday we try to find time to spend together with each other and the children. Last Tuesday we decided to head to our local Garden centre (Dobbies) to have some Lunch, they also have a lovely little play area which is great for Finlay to play about in whilst we eat and catch up!

I find that the bond between grandparents and grandchildren is so unique. I always had such a special bond with my Nan, she really was the most amazing lady. I spent a lot of time with her and saw her most days. My most cherished childhood memories always include her and I find that so comforting, especially now that she is no longer with us, I can always look back and say that I never missed a special moment with her. Finlay adores both sets of grandparents, and his face just lights up whenever we go to see them, I just feel its so important that he has that relationship with them.

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Once we had finished eating we spent a bit of time playing with Finlay in the little area they have. They have a lovely little wooden wendy house in there which is so lovely for the children to play in. My mum joined Finlay in there and he absolutely loved it, just the look on his little face shows how much he loves his nanny. So as I sat there watching the pair of them pretend they were in a shop one minute, and then in ‘Finlays House’ the next, I had a moment where I felt I really couldn’t be luckier. Some children aren’t able to see their grandparents as much, and some have never had the chance to meet them. I feel so blessed to be able to share my wonderful boys with them, and they are so grateful that they have that chance too. My parents do so much for my little family, and have given us so much support throughout the years, I really couldn’t imagine not seeing them the amount we do. Sometimes it takes these little days and moments for you to be able to see that there really isn’t anything better that even comes close to having a family.

It’s in the ordinary moments, when you realise you are so extraordinarily lucky.

Chloe

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